|Be a man- Really?|
I have always stressed how important it is to respect a female. Personally I feel, they are the most important existence on Earth, without them we all have no identity. Barring that, I also feel it's very important to female's and male's alike to understand how negatively society portrays a man. It's very hard being a MALE in today's world.
Just a few days back, I was watching this ad which throughout show's how boy's are taught not to express their emotional outbursts -- more specially, BOY'S DON'T CRY. At the end of the same ad it showed because of this men tend to abuse women (because they have suppressed emotion). Naturally I was disgusted and very angry at the way men were being portrayed in the ad. But it also left me thinking.
From the day we are born, till the day we die- our parents, and society have already set a guideline that we have to follow. A boy means, the whole responsibility of the family falls on him. He cannot cry, despite not being smart at school, he still has to earn money for the family. 'Don't Cry' is the first rule of being a boy. Whatever happens, don't show your emotions. Whatever happens, don't let go of your macho image. A boy at a certain age has to get married and produce a 'vaaris' (son) as soon as possible.
You might have noticed that the male presence in your life -- be it your dad, brother, boyfriend, husband or friend- very rarely talk about their emotions or express it. Men bottle up their emotion and push it at the very back of their heart. Whatever happens, don't bring it out. Another thing is that men can't panic. During emergencies, no matter how afraid we might get, don't show it. You lose job, a loved one or are naturally unhappy- don't cry and don't show it, is the unwritten rule.
Men do get abused. Men do get domestically violated. But nobody knows. Today we have thousands if not millions of Women's Crisis Center around the world. How many centers are there for Men? NONE. Despite being abused, men cannot tell about it to another peer- He might get laughed at. He might be told he is not MAN enough, that's why he got abused.
Fear and MACHO image. These 2 thing's have ruined men's life. No one would admit it, but we do feel afraid. We do feel uncertain at times. But whom do we get to talk to? No one. We can't cry publicly or in front of a close person -- Real Men don't cry. You must be thinking why am I stressing on crying? Cause crying is the most natural form of expressing our emotions, and that outlet for MEN is always closed. Men has to act in a certain manner in society. We are expected to remain calm, take charge of the situation during uncertain times, and at no point of time- express uncertainty. I think there should be more Mental Health Centers for men. Those who think there is no need for that, let me ask you a question: Aren't men humans too and don't they have emotions? I ask each and everyone one of you, next time when you look at the men in your life- appreciate them. You don't know what's going on in their life. And Men- IT'S OKAY TO CRY! IT'S OKAY TO FEEL AFRAID! IT'S OKAY TO BE YOURSELF!
|Ashneel J Prasad is the Oceania (New Zealand/ Fiji) correspondent of JeevanMag.com A Fijian of Indian descent, Ashneel is currently a student of B.A communications at Massey University, Auckland, New Zealand.|